My Greatest Fear

If I were to say I was fearless, I would obviously be lying to you. Have you ever asked the question of what strikes fear in your soul? Maybe it’s that fear of heights, spiders, or failing a class. I’ll be honest, I’m personally not a fan of being in tight spaces, and I always feel a little anxious during crucial conversations. But by far, there is one thing that I fear more than anything else. My biggest fear is getting so consumed in sin, that Jesus dying on the cross is not a reality to me.

Let me explain. I don’t think we realise how serious this sin issue is. Before Christ died on the cross, a sheep would be sacrificed because of the peoples sins looking into the book of Leviticus. But imagine walking a perfectly innocent sheep to an altar and looking at it’s eyes as the priest slit its neck. The sight of that dying sheep, had to have brought tears to the people that it represented. The shedding of blood of an animal that did not deserve it.

Obviously it is so convenient and nice to not have to sacrifice a lamb in behalf of my family for all the times we fall short. But even that convenience can cause us to forget the significance of Christ being that lamb on the cross. I sometimes don’t realise that because of my selfish tendencies, and my short comings, Christ had to spend time beaten, naked, and bloody for me. And that is my greatest fear. To get so engulfed in sin that it doesn’t hurt me to see Jesus on the cross every time I fall short. To get to that point of belittling sin and tell myself that overcoming this tiny sin is not that big of a deal.

Hebrews 6:6 writes “if they fall away, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify again for themselves the Son of God, and put Him to an open shame.” This chapter in Hebrew speaks on progressing in the Christian walk. But verse six really stood out to me because it writes that when we fall away from God, it’s as if we crucify Jesus and put Him to open shame again. I obviously don’t think it should be taken literally, because I can’t imagine Christ being on a cross in heaven. But I do wonder that if every time I fall, does it remind Him of that day He spent on the cross. Does he remember the crowd yelling at Him every time I’m to stubborn to listen. Cause if that’s the case, I really don’t want anything to do with sin.