Happily Single?

Something I love about being at Weimar Institute is that when I walk into the dorm whether it be the Hilton or Hillside, the bros are always kicking back on the couches talking about life.  I can't help but join in. Sooner or later throughout the conversation, the topic has this tendency to change to relationships and family life.  I actually really appreciate that we are able to talk about this topic in a respectful and virtuous manner.  However, as I think more and more about it, I believe there is a reason why this topic is brought up time after time......... All the guys are in love ;) I hope we can still be friends after this devotional thought.  

I've often heard in seminars that in order to be happily married you must first be happily single.  But real talk, what does it mean to be happily single?  I'm no expert in relationships knowing that I've got ohhh you know twenty years of life under my belt and a couple of christmas banquets for experience.  But here are some thoughts.

1) Happily Single Means Fully Satisfied

Philippians 4:11

Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content.

Are we content and fully satisfied in our relationship with Christ as of today?  It's quite easy to say we are, but if our thoughts and conversations are often based upon the other gender, then maybe we're not.  Very often if you dig deep enough there is this feeling of dissatisfaction until a relationship or marriage comes our way, and this may rather be a sign, that Christ first needs to win our heart.  

I remember having another bro talk with some guys one night, and the question was, "Do you feel ready to be in a relationship?"  A good friend of mine said, "Before I get there, I need to first grow in love with Jesus."  As I pondered upon that answer, I realized the truth found in it.  I mean, who wouldn't want to say yes?  However realize that Jesus wants to first be in a deeper relationship with you.  Don't get me wrong I'm not trying to say that you should cast out any emotional feelings towards anyone of the opposite gender, for there will be a time when that will arise for the majority of Christians. What I am trying to say is ask yourself, am I fully satisfied in Him?  

2) Seize the Day

Psalms 90:12

So teach us to number our days,
That we may gain a heart of wisdom.

I never thought numbering your days was a good thing, but it's biblical so I better start today.  When you realize that the days you have are limited, you start living them more intentionally.  Now get this, your time as a single individual may not last forever.  So you better start doing the things that you can as a single individual and enjoy them.  I'm not talking about playing basketball or going to Taco Bell in the middle of the night (cause I totally have never done that in my experience in Weimar, (sarcasm)).  I'm talking ministry and spontaneity.  

How often can you grab a bunch of bros or sistaaahs, depending on who you are, and randomly decide to go across the world to teach English and preach.  How about to spontaneously decide to drive up to Oregon to visit your brother and eat donuts with him (true story, and I must say, voodoo donuts have the best vegan donuts).  The fact is if your one track mind is preoccupied with relationships, then I must say that you are missing out on the blessings of singleness.  Don't forget the opportunities you have now while you don't have to worry about meeting the needs of another individual or a family.  The time will come, but as of today, make sure to seize the day!

3) Become the Individual That You Want Your Spouse to Meet

In the mean time, ask God to better prepare you for that individual you will be meeting down the road.  Look at yourself and ask yourself this question, "Yo, would I want someone marrying me as I am?"  If you can say yes, well praise the Lord!  However, many of us including myself would realize the struggles we go through, as well as the bad habits we need to break. This often brings me to my knees coming to God, asking Him to give me victory in these different aspects of my life, that I may be more ready to pursue a relationship with someone else in the future.  I'm not saying that you have to become a saint and then pursue a relationship, but you know the vices that God needs to give you victory in, that way you will be more ready to glorify Him in the relationship you pursue.  Here's a verse of hope as you are on this journey!

Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert.  Isaiah 43:19

4) Ask Jesus to Satisfy You

You who in heart long for something better than this world can give, recognize this longing as the voice of God to your soul. Steps to Christ 28

As you go throughout your day, take some time and ask yourself, "Am I satisfied in Christ?"  Jesus really wants to fill that need of companionship deep within your heart.  We should really ask ourselves daily, "Am I satisfied in Him?"  Many of us might not be able to say "yes" at the moment, and that's ok.  Simply ask God to take your heart today and reveal His love to you that you may fall in love with Him before anyone else.